Yeh Unn Dinon ki Baat Hai!

Please note : The names mentioned are fictional names and have nothing to do with their namesakes in current times. 

Circa-‘80’s

Scene 1 –

Supriya - (Thinking to herself) – I can’t wait for the days when I get to go to my aunt’s house. I long to see that handsome boy who stays in my aunts colony

Amit – (Thinking to himself) – I wish for that beautiful girl to come to A/24, where her relatives stay – This time I will make sure to ask her name.

Scene 2 – After about 1 month

Supriya – (Standing on the window and talking to herself) – Oh here he is!! How handsome he looks. Oh My God, he is staring at me, waving and smiling at me. Should I smile back?? What will he think? What if someone sees me smiling and waving back at him? I am so scared.

Amit – (Passing by her house and talking to himself) – Oh wow! Here she is… She is such a beauty to watch. I just can’t stop staring at her. Let me try to initiate a contact.  Let me just smile and wave …hope she responds back with a smile and a wave.

Scene 3 – After 2 months

Supriya – (Sheepishly and hurriedly picking up the piece of paper thrown in the front yard) – I just saw him throwing in my front yard. What would it be? Let me just hurry and pick it up before anyone sees it. Oh wow. It’s a letter written by him. He likes me and would want to know me more. He has also asked me for my address to write to me in future. I think I should write a letter back to him with my details. An exchange of few letters would help us understand each other better. I will throw my reply letter back to him when he comes tomorrow.

Amit – (Gathering courage to make the first move) – Let me just write her a letter. Maybe if she’s equally interested in me, she will respond with her address and a letter stating her feelings. Maybe I will come back to her home tomorrow to see if she gives back a letter to me.

Scene 4 –  After 3 years

After exchanges of ample hand written letters over a period of 3 years, it was time to propose Marriage. And then, they lived happily Ever After.

Circa – 90’s

Scene 1- First day of Last year of Graduation in college

Rahul – (sitting on a bench in his college class) – Wow Look at that beautiful girl who just walked in. I think she’s the one. I wish she comes and sits besides me. I would be so happy if she chooses me.

Priya – (Entering the class of her new college) - Let me look around and decide where I want to sit. Oh look, I see a gorgeous boy staring at me with a smile. I think he likes me. I should go and sit besides him. Maybe we will look good together.

Scene 2 - After about 3 months.

Rahul – (Confidently walking hands in hands with Priya in a college canteen) – After a lot of chits exchanged between us through our classmates during lectures, I finally proposed to her, writing my feeling on a chit, and she said yes!!! So Look Here’s my girlfriend. I am so happy. We look so good together.

Priya – (Sheepishly walking by his side and shying away from the public glares) – Yes he passed on so many chits in the class and in one chit he proposed and I said yes, written on a chit. We gel so well and he is my best friend. We look good together. Maybe someday when he proposes marriage, I will say yes and we will talk to our parents.

Scene 3 - After a year

Rahul – (Feeling emotional, yet motivated) – With a letter of admission in a university abroad, he tells Priya that he is going to USA for further studies. Promising her that he will definitely be in touch with her over letters, emails and chats.

Priya – (Sobbing profusely, yet happy for him) – Taking all sorts of assurances that He will miss her, write to her regularly and be in touch via letters and chats. Also taking a promise that he won’t get close to at any other girl in the USA.

Scene 4 - After 2 years

After a lot of emails exchanged over the year, innumerable late night chats due to the time difference, Rahul came back and proposed a marriage to Priya, and after marriage, they lived Happily Ever After, setting back in the USA.

So now, you may ask, what’s so special about these love stories. Seems like a regular scene straight out of some Bollywood movie. No my dear readers, this is how a romance actually brewed in reality, in the 1980’s and 1990’s. In the digital age, the love story starts immediately after one meeting and ends with proposal for an affair in 3 days. The Proposal for a marriage may or may not come in the future. And even if a marriage proposal comes within a year, it may or may not continue for more than couple of years. 

So what’s so special about the romance in the 80’s and 90’s? People in those decades, took time to really understand each other. unlike this current generation who want everything instantly. The people and the emotions were pure, real , committed, unadulterated, with no urge of looking for options and not fake, unlike today’s generation love, which often isn’t real, or its just more of an attraction and infatuation. The people in older times were loyal, they had an in-depth understanding of feelings and emotions, understood the real meaning of companion, had respect for each other and had the patience to handle fights, arguments and differences in a relationship.

Romance in those times had a different but beautiful charm in itself. Before the invention of all the latest social media apps, like Whatsapp, Facebook et al, the conversations mainly happened through a long handwritten letter, or a long email, where it was possible for a person to write out their emotions at length. The feeling of urgency in opening a letter or an email received, the eagerness in waiting for a reply or a call on the landline, the skip of a heartbeat when you see a letter written and sent by the partner, the poems which were written from the heart, the wordings used were original and real, unlike finding it on google these days.

I remember back in the 80’s and  90’s people would wait for hours on a road opposite to where the partner stays, or at a bus stop just to get a glimpse of their loved ones. They had different ways of signaling to their partner about their arrival. Some guys would whistle below the girl’s house, some would give each other a cut ring on a landline as signal that they are leaving home. And exactly after few minutes or the calculated time measuring the distance, the other would get down… start walking separately, shying and saving themselves from the glares of the people staying in same locality, and meeting at a particular point where they were sure of not to be seen. getting into Physical intimacy took ages, unlike todays gen -X who want everything to be done in the first meet itself.

In current time, all these things are often termed as silly and people think it’s a waste of time. These days’ people just message, call and on special occasions write some messages usually copied from google. These days’ people often lack patience, originality, and relationships go kaput over the minutest reasons or fights. Reason being- there are variety of options available in the dating market. Everyone is on a lookout for a loyal companion, or a partner, but no one wants to be one. Everyone feels they could always find a better option than their current one.

Marriages that happened in the 80’s and 90’s stick around irrespective of the differences. They valued their relationships; they respected their partners, appreciated and acknowledged their presence in their lives. Another reason is that they were also concerned about the society, their kids. Society wasn’t as open minded as it is today. These days many marriages end up in divorces, due to the options available in society. These days people just want to look out for their own happiness, (Which is not a bad thing), but not bothering about the partner, the kids, parents isn’t a good thing either.

I often miss the personal touch of writing a hand written letter, or an email which comes out straight from heart. I may be a modern girl, who has eventually fallen prey to the current modes of communication, but by heart, I am still an old school thought girl. I still write long hand written letters or long emails (of course sometimes taking help from the Mother Google for some poems or words as I ain’t that creative in writing – Guilty as charged!!!). I still prefer picking up a phone and calling someone whom I wish to talk to, and talk for long hours, rather than just messaging someone a Hi, how are you?

I do wish that sometimes in the near future, people start living the way our older generation lived. Then hopefully then there will be less fall outs, less breakups and less divorces. I wish people strengthen their loyalties, their level of patience and the ability to handles differences.